Thursday, January 28, 2010

up and down

Klwmbc's.curi from fian's tumblr.


Life's fine.Okay no,actually kinda suck but i just have to face the fact.There is more people out there going through a sucker tougher times.I tried to think positive most of the time but one day when i totally hide my feelings inside,the night i fucking burst out.fucking can't stand anymore.Three of my pillows went completely wet.Then april (my cat) came into my room just on time and lean near me and licked my fingers.I cried harder.

I just went back from julie's house.okay her grandma's .Shieqa went nuts because who-know-why.They said something thats going to haunt me every night.seriously shitt.

I feel like munching unhealthy junk food.Im at syaz's now so 7 eleven is just nearby so..okay no tak jadi.malas.Syazzz nakk maakkaaann.I know,this is why im fat.

I want to go.I feel like hugging someone.


P.s.i will do tumblr someday.


I miss our old times.
you're not like the one i first met you.
i miss the caring look you gave me.
i miss the smile in your face when im around you.
i miss all the jokes you told me when i was sad.
where have you been ?
i miss my akiem terribly.

ps.i love you always
because i know you didnt mean it.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

sub sub

Hello guys,

phant* i still have asthma.but not so bad.shit why the hell it won't go away.I am still in my jammies.jammies are so comfortable aaa.I like the roominess of big boxers.okay stop.

Yesterday there was sekolah ganti so i went to school.The first thee periods we all suppose to do a bit gotong royong in our clas so i was busy bossing people to do this and that.really,i was in a semangat mood.eceh assistant monitor HAHA .I was a bit pissed of since my teacher didnt tell us that we were going to decorate the class.So we did everything in the last minute.I have a lot of materials and papers at home but we end up just using a4 papers since no one has the proper materials.and our teacher expect us to finish everything by today.Sometimes i think people are soo smart~.

After school i went back a bit late with theera since she wants to hang out with her i hung ot with baim.akiem didnt came to school.Things were borringg without him.Then i came back to school to finish band's board.Wow we have many pictures but i think we just put half of it in the board.Then went back with dad.change,sleeeeep.

okay no before that i had tea.and shower and pray of course.So i end yesterday by calling akiem.His phone went missing.Its hard to make contact,i dnt know how he's doing.seriously missing him everyday.Some stupid thieve took it and so i called his house phone.haiyo mahall but hearing his voice ,its like anything else doesnt matter.

Okay i want to take a shower.its already 1 pm.

I love my akiem so much.He is minee.u dn't know how lucky i am to have him :)

Friday, January 22, 2010


Sometimes i feel really far apart from my friends nowadays.she has a boyfriend,and lepak kat sana and then i have a boyfriend lepak kat sini,dia ada boyfriend lepak kat situ,dia pergi koko pergi sana,dia ada jumpa kawan lain lepak situ,dia pergi rumah kawan ni,dia lepak gerai,makan randomness.I miss my friends a lot eventhough we meet everyday,i feel not as close as before.I hope we remain closee friends till the the end.I love my girls so much

Tuesday, January 19, 2010


I had asthma for three days.really disturbing.i can't sleep these past days.I miss my friends,i miss my boy,i miss everybody.I feel so lifeless sitting at home.Most everything i do makes me feel used or angry or plain boring.Mesti period nak dekat.ffffff

I want keropok lekor right noww.i know,suddenly.but really,i feel like munching keropoks.I AM SO HUNGRY.

Myspace is getting boring (hoorayy no more addicted).or maybe im the one who is boring.yes.But sadly i develop a new addiction.I can't sleep without playing guitar hero in mum's iphone.nuuuuuuuuuuu.Oh bytheway,i miss homeworks.i miss writing.seriously.I even think i was mad for missing hmworks.Lol its just had been four days ,da aku miss everythingg.hadoi.

tomorrow,band,the next day,seni visual then the next next day,choir.

fucked up things is catching up with me.
stay calm neesa,doodaadoooo


Monday, January 18, 2010

Ventolin on the safe side

I didnt go to school today.I have asthma attack.Its veryy difficult to breathe.

omg im dying.

nasty dream

I dreamt of scratching her face,pulling her hair out and punching non stop till she fell off on the floor bleeding.

What is that suppose to mean?

Friday, January 15, 2010

Eiffel eifa

Hey guys,

i've been busy so my blog is getting boring isnt it?I got tons of homeworks and projects to do.Ajiem forced me to update my blog soo yelaahh haha kidding la macha.

Im home alone now.My family went out for dinner as my nose went runny all the time.ohh noo i can sense feverbug going to attack me.shit.I am not so hungry lately and i rarely eat on time.Somtimes i feel full just by loking at my meal.Oh no.

I had choir practice today.I mean,i was in the seni visual but syaz invited me to come so i give it a shot.I love singing but im quite of shy myself singing infront of everyone.I had no experience in choir so today is my first time.*lame .I just do this for fun u know,not serious tho.I will sing the first suprano with shieqa and the other girls.High notess ,dah la sakit tekak tadi.

I think i like guitar.i think.i have one at home.sometimes two.i don't know where my sister get them 0.0 .Ijol and akiem thought me your call (halahh your call je...).im just a starter,bodoh bodoh je.tak gempak mcm ..*silence

ohh ohhh i wished someone bday today,wanted to buy him a pack of sweets haha(saja nak merosakkan gigi dia sempena hari jadi) but i lost sight of him after wishing him haha sooo HAPPY BIRTHDAYY BAIMM!

Forgive me for the last post.oh emotional days..u had em too.

and i love my boy so much.


P.s.haaaa puas hati ajiemm? haha


mada faka sial manusia sekarang.sayang sangat dengan dia tu.yelah kann kiteorang apa je.tak menarik,tak lawa,BUDAK-BUDAK,tak gempak la kan.Kata macam bodoh membe lupa membe sebab nak dapatkan hati membe lagi satu padahal buat benda yang sama.

macam ni ah manusia

fucking pissed off

Saturday, January 9, 2010



Lol okay this is what happens if dah excited sangattt



I didn't mean to be showy but i love to share what i like so stop fucking judge me.The doughnut ring ,i always stare at it when im hungry and it actually makes me feel full too.uhhh,what?..Last week i bought another ring which its on crazy diva sale.I went fucking nuts.

Today is me and my boy 2nd month anniversary.I love you <3 .I see him almost everyday now since we're in a same school in morning session.

This 2010 i am really serious about my study.I promised to myself.So far i done things good,first i actually went online only twice a week.good start eyy.i am not so addictive as im used to.Second,i tend to finish my homeworks on time(yes!!),third,i actually really can relate to the phrase 'time is gold' because now i just can't stand sitting in my room and just staring at the walls.Really a waste of time.(which this is what i often did last year and so).HURRAH !

Life feels fucking long now.


Friday, January 8, 2010


Whats happening to you?


Wednesday, January 6, 2010

i went all bunny

Hi guys !

I haven't been posting much since school starts.School was,kinda awesome.My first day was okay but a little awkward of course.fine teachers but the second day homeworks already started flooding.So far i payed my full attention in class.I didn't sit at the back or else i will get really distracted and so i sat beside syaz.So far so good.

I had problems with transportasi after school.So effing random .For unit beruniform,of course one and only ssaasband for sure.As for umm kelab ,i wanted seni visual.

Okay mum just ruined my fucking mood.

bye. won't be posting much this year.Im going to be away.


Saturday, January 2, 2010

Newly wed

Hi guys,

First i want to apologize to my fellow band members for not making it to practice.I once missed my close family's wed due to band function so this time mum won't make me miss this one .

Arrived at the dewan around 10 and started helping.Guest started to arrive and im busy greeting and giving out bunga telur.5 hours later,still in charge of the bunga telur.I was definitely screaming inside because mum's heels is killin me.It has no grip.Effin pain in the tut but *still smiling.
My cousin,kaknina is still a student and already got herself a husband.I like her green pengantin dress tho :) Congratulations kaknina i hope you guys will be happy together forever.

One zit is going to appear in my face anytime soon.Fffuu.

"What if you loved ones,ask for your help to die?"
-wow thats hard to answer.Im already breathless by the question itself 0.0

Question i saw in the cover of one of jodi picoult's book.


Friday, January 1, 2010

best medicine

I remembered the time before me and my boyfriend became official..

back in october,
I was alone and sick at home alone,

him :Youu ni sakit ada panadol tak nii
me :I bru check td ,dh habis but its okay jap lg i baik la tuu kay
*trying to not making him worry where i really feel sick and needed medicine
him :betul nii?
me :betul laa

and what i know,the next thing he showed up in front of my house and bought me a pack of panadol.

That was the moment i really care about him and realize how much he cares about me too.
Who really needs panadol when you have love to help you heal
I love you syg,so much


and boom its 2010


I celebrate it by sitting outside the house alone while my sis going out with her gals catching the fireworks.fuck.

I checked applications on mum's iphone,izodiac and they said that 2010 is a very lucky but a bit pressuring year for pig.Yes i was born in the pig years which explains alot cuz im kinda my own pig myself.pressuring year? oh yeahh pmr.right.very lucky year?i can't wait.

2009 thought me a lot of things.Bad fucked up things that makes me understand feelings i often wondered and naive about.I will never learn if those shit didn't happen to me.Im grateful.

School starts this Monday.ohh isn't it exciting...